Flip A Weakness Into A Strength with 4 Simple Steps

In last weeks blog I posted a short video clip.  Remember the mouse and cheese?

If you didn’t see it be sure to watch it because its less than 1 minute and 30 seconds and it’s what I’m talking about in this post.

That blog post was about turning a weakness into a strength or a problem/shortcoming to a positive.  I challenged you to give it a go and also promised I’d share one of mine.

So, here it is.  Quite some time ago I missed out on a speaking gig that I was in the running for.  And to stick with the mouse analogy this gig was my Havarti (my favourite cheese).  Man, let me tell you, I could smell it and taste it.  I really, really wanted this gig and my name was all over it.

BUT, I didn’t get it and I was shattered to say the least.

What's your cheese (weakness)?

I moped around for a bit, had my head down, for a little while I felt sorry for myself and retreated into our theater room to watch my favourite Entourage and Seinfeld DVD’s… I was also eating all sorts of junk that I didn’t need.

Now I haven’t told you the whole story.  The gig I was going for was part of a long-term program that had many other components for which the company’s own internal technical trainers were responsible for delivering.  The difficulty for the client was that the momentum, energy, excitement and outcomes that I’m known for generating in my sessions couldn’t be matched by their internal technical trainers for the remainder of the program.

They actually said they wanted someone more “ordinary” so the standard wouldn’t be set so high and then make the rest of the program look average in comparison.  So I understand their reasoning and whilst it’s fundamentally floored it was the easiest thing for them to do at the time.

So just like the mouse in the video, as it lay there when it was caught in the trap I took a few deep breaths to regroup, and then all of a sudden BANG there it was, the strength, the positive I’d been missing.  Well it wasn’t really missing I just wasn’t looking for it, because I was so wrapped up in not getting the gig I couldn’t see it.

So, here’s the Top 4 things I did:

1. I slammed the brakes on in my brain and just said to myself, “NOOOOOO way… WHAT am I thinking – STOP IT!!!!”  I actually yelled out “STOP, STOP, STOP!”
2. Got on the phone to one of my long-time coaches and asked for his advice, knowing full well I was about to get my butt kicked!
3. Got even clearer about my personal brand and my STRENGTHS.  I’m fun, energetic, strong and most importantly ALL ABOUT the score on the board – the RESULTS and that’s exactly how I deliver the message.  I’m a professional speaker not a trainer.
4. Decided I’m not “ordinary” and instantly change my SELF TALK… I’m extraordinary and only want to work with other people who also want to be EXTRAORDINARY by Stepping Up to really go for outstanding outcomes NOT the safe, sensible and sanitised option otherwise known as  ‘tick the box’ classroom training.

So my weakness wasn’t missing out on the gig.  My weakness was my attitude to not getting it… AND my strength is the clarity of who I am, what I deliver and who I choose to work with.  And that was massively INVIGORATING for me.

So, if you’ve ever:

• Been overlooked for a job;
• Missed out on a promotion;
• Lost an opportunity to showcase your services or products;
• Felt hard done by because someone chose your competition over you;
• Came in 2^nd, 3^rd or even missed the medals all together; or
• Just plain old been knocked back

…it’s natural to feel the rejection and even get angry – actually if you don’t it means you’re apathetic and shouldn’t have been in the race in the first place…

But here’s the key – your level of success is directly determined by how quickly you shift your focus from the crisis (seeing your weakness) to the opportunity.

It’s all about SPEED.  Remember the mouse… if it waited too long it would’ve been too late.

So the next time you’re in an unresourceful state, I want you to remember and DO these 4 things:

1. I want you to literally yell out loud, “STOP, STOP, STOP!” – Obviously you need to use discretion with the yelling out depending on where you are.
2. Get on the phone to your coach, mentor, confidante or trusted adviser ASAP.  DO NOT call your best friend or anyone else who will validate your ‘poor me’ state and  keep you stuck – call the person who’ll kick your butt and hold you to a higher standard.
3. Quickly do a STRENGTHS inventory and focus on all the qualities that make you great, successful and valuable.
4. Change your SELF TALK instantly – I mean it, start talking to yourself in a strong, animated way and go on rant about why you are AWESOME, UNIQUE and INCREDIBLY VALUABLE.  Look, I know this may sound a bit weird to you, but did you know the major difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is the way they talk to themselves?

Now  if you know someone who can tend to focus on their weaknesses every now and again make sure you share this with them.

Catch ya next time where I’ll be doing my very first Video blog.

Success and nothing less,

Dave Lourdes